There was a story on NPR this morning that caught my attention at about 5:45 a.m., no small feat. The American Psychiatric Association is proposing changes to diagnostic guidelines that would remove the "bereavement exclusion" from diagnoses of major depression.The symptoms:
- Difficulty sleeping
- Crying over the memories of a loved one
- Loss of appetite
- Loss of energy
- Loss of concentration
Major depression? Me? It's just not true. But I lost my husband twice - first to mental illness, then to suicide - and that makes me sad. My daughters don't have a father, and that keeps me awake at night. I have an overwhelming amount responsibility, and that saps my energy.
Ten months in, I still have most of the symptoms (sadly, loss of appetite seems to be gone). It gets better as time marches on and even better when I'm disciplined about using the tools I've developed to help myself.
If I had resolved all of these symptoms in two weeks, then I think a diagnosis would be in order. As my wise friend Polly says, "Some things are supposed to suck."
Righttt - so if you managed to "get over" the loss of your spouse and begin eating, sleeping and funcitoning "normally" again within TWO WEEKS you are OK? ???!???
ReplyDeleteWelllll ... can I tell you now that I have a different diagnosis for the brainaics who thought that one up: ID.... as in "Idiot Disorder".
(My second choice of name - the first one was NFI as in No F-ing Idea)
I like "opulently clueless" from the dictionary of loss. The people who saw me a week or so after matt drowned were like "oh, are you still sad?" My response was "yeah, watching your husband die has that affect on you." I think people want us to be okay, because we're their nightmares, and if we are okay, then everything is okay, all is well.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.kotapress.com/section_home/dictionary_intro.htm
Well said, Megan. It is difficult to be our friend right now, so it's understandably easier for our friends if we seem okay. I'm so fortunate to have a handful of true friends who can handle the truth.
ReplyDeleteUnbelievable! After two weeks I could still hardly believe what had happened- when are we supposed to deal with this stuff if drugged after just two weeks!
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